Life's Work: Staying Within the Lines on Homework Help
THE NEW YORK TIMES | December 4, 2005 | By LISA BELKIN

Lisa Jacobson runs a tutoring business, Inspirica, in Manhattan, and she has seen parents at their worst, their most enmeshed, their pushiest. Parents who do their children's art projects for them, so the third-grade classroom looks, she said, "like a gallery at MoMA." Parents who tinker with science labs and correct math homework and edit English essays until the child does not recognize more than a comma in an opening sentence.

And yet, despite all her professional knowledge÷maybe, in fact, because of it÷Ms. Jacobson has been known to step in and help at 10:30 at night when her fifth-grade son is in a panic because his mountain of homework is not done. "The long-term goal is that 18 years from now you want your kid to stand on his or her own two feet," she said. "But you can't expect them to pop out and be masters of everything. You have to help them get there."

It is hard, she knows, to draw lines. And it is even harder when what you do at work makes you particularly equipped to help at home. In our house, my husband is a scientist and I am a writer, but neither of us is a teacher, and there is a constant question of how much help is too much.

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